I actually hope he's not kidding

"This can't end well. Can't possibly end well."

The Arizona Daily Star article about Ryan Dempster training to be a ninja

The response from ESPN.com's Patrick Hruby

My own reaction: If this is all true, Ryan, you had an ERA of 4.80 last season. Perhaps working with your pitching coach rather than a sensei might be the better choice. And honestly? Nothing in the sports realm really surprises me anymore.