Dancing. Torn tendons. Suicide attempts. You know, the usual.

My Chickball writings are turning into somewhat lazy and disjointed, pseudo-Buster Olney kind of entries. But meh.

On Emmitt Smith: I meant to mention this sooner but it gives me great joy to see he's on Dancing with the Stars. I can't explain it. And you know what? Judging by the commercials, he's actually good. Think we could see Willie McGinest on the show in a few years?

On Pedro: Wow. You can practically smell the devastation drifting out of the Mets dugout. This is huge. I never really thought the Mets would win the World Series, but now? They don't have a chance. It's not just that they lost a Cy Young Award winning pitcher for the post-season but it's the change in attitude that will ultimately doom the team. While David Wright is thinking on the positive side, quoted as saying the Mets will go far in the playoffs with or without Pedro, other guys seem less than optimistic. Willie Randolph, Tom Glavine, Julio Franco, and even Omar Minaya have conveyed their extreme disappointment. Instead, they should be pumping up the team and looking past this. If I were Minaya, I'd be searching for a motivational speaker in the Yellow Pages right about now.

On T.O.: My feelings on the Terrell Owens business can be summed up in this way: LOL. Initially, I simply raised an eyebrow at the supposed suicide attempt but then decided this was a situation that warranted a good laugh. The best part of the whole thing (aside from his idiot publicist bitching out the police): the t-shirt T.O. was wearing in the latest batch of photographs. Yes, it says "U Big Dummy!" Intentional or not?

On the breakup of Daniel Cabrera's no-hitter: F-you, Robinson Cano. Thanks for giving me yet another reason to hate your team.

On sports team abbreviations: Enough is enough. This morning I was checking out ESPN.com and saw "Avs forward Konowalchuk retires after heart tests." The Avs? What the hell. First of all, it took me a good 15 seconds to figure out who the heck they were talking about (the Colorado Avalanche, if anyone is still wondering) and second, it just doesn't sound right. "I was at the Avs game the other night." No thanks. But I'm still okay with Mavs and fine with M's.

On Trot Nixon: Sad that he'll probably be leaving the Red Sox after this season. Tis truly the end of an era. Yes, his numbers have tailed off tremendously and his injury ridden self is too much of a liability at this point, but a Red Sox team without Trot is strange to imagine. I only started religiously following the team about 10 years ago, and that's around the time he joined the organization. So long, Trot. You and your gross batting helmet will be missed.

the astros/cardinals debacle

Would anyone like to explain this extremely late-season Astros run for the playoffs to me? Because even the resident Astros fan of the bunch of us certainly long-ago wrote off the team for this season. They hadn't been above .500 in months; now they've won 9 straight and are only 1 game back from the previously ever-winning Cards.

I guess I should be used to this by now, though... two years ago, the 'Stros made a September run and made it to the playoffs. Last year, the Houston Chronicle had given a big RIP headstone to the team on the sports page by the end of May, when they had started 15-30, and they ended up in the World Series for the first time ever.

Why do I always root for crazy teams that constantly leave you with that intense pressure feeling in your chest?

on NYC baseball and why the Mets won the division

After traveling to NYC with several friends yesterday to attend the Mets/Nationals game at Shea Stadium, it becomes obvious to me why the Mets ran away with their division (and the national league) this year. This team, even after they've already clinched and don't need anything else until playoffs start, is focused and driven to make the most of mistakes. They exploit their opportunities, and although it was still apparent that they had already clinched (examples: leaving the starter in after he had walked in two runs and was making a mess of the next inning; letting Billy Wagner pitch in a non-save situation when he didn't necessarily have his best stuff), they play hard and they play smart, and in the end, that's going to win ballgames. And of course, the multi-million payroll always helps too.

As side notes, David Wright hit a 3-run home run to make my day complete (it still freaks me out that there are guys playing this game in the majors that are very very close to our age), and New Yorkers are still New Yorkers in that they are the quickest (with Boston fans a close second) to turn on their own guys, but the atmosphere at Shea was definitely a lot more friendly and less disturbing than at Yankee Stadium when I went there last summer. The people there seemed more like fans of baseball and the team and guys themselves, while the Yankee fans just seemed like fans of hating me (the Boston fan) and the tradition of Yankee baseball. Vast generalization, I know, but it's just a point of reference that I noted while there.

In the vein of the other Chickball girls, I will be adopting the Tigers as my postseason team this year - I always love the former underdog turned good, my grandma used to be a hardcore Tigers fan, and hey, why not. My best-case scenario for the World Series? Tigers/Mets. I think it'd be a fun series to watch. October baseball is about to begin!

I kind of wanna meet the Sports Gal...

Just wanted to draw everyone's attention to Bill Simmons' Friday NFL picks column. If you haven't been following it since week one, you may be unaware of the Sports Gal's new mini-column, which is basically one of the funniest things ever. In order to persuade her to go up against the Sports Guy's NFL picks, ESPN has allowed her to write pretty much whatever she wants once a week as a sidebar. Laugh-outloud-funny, people. This week, it's a serious take on US Weekly and Ashlee Simpson. Keep in mind that it appears on a page devoted entirely to football. I love the absurdity. Today's favorite quote:

If Bill were famous and Charlize trounced me by a landslide in US Weekly, I'd never attend another red carpet event and probably wouldn't leave the house anymore. Although I guess I'd be kind of psyched that I was in the magazine. I don't know. Either way, I think US Weekly owes Mrs. The Rock an apology.

(By the way, she's beating the Sports Guy: 16-16 on the season while he's 15-17. Ha.)

Adopting a team

Hi, my name is Pam and I'm a Red Sox fan. So it has been for the last 10 years of my life. But over the past few years, I have branched out and explored the vast world of Major League Baseball.

For those unaware, there are other teams aside from the one you root for. Really. Pick up a national paper someday or check ESPN.com. Occasionally, you'll see a headline about organizations with such names as "Marlins," "Athletics," and "Diamondbacks." (Wait, who? Never heard of them.) You know those "guys" Your Team plays all season? They are what you call "opponents" and they do not exist for the sole purpose of playing Your Team. It's true. Bud Selig does not throw together random players so that Your Team has the pleasure of performing on a regular basis. Hard to imagine, I know.

So anyway.

The Red Sox season is over. It's painful, I don't like to talk about it, but I'm not ready to let go of the 2006 season just yet. And as a baseball fanatic first and a Red Sox fan second, I have decided to adopt another team, a team I can really get behind and root for in the next month or so. Why not? I love this game and we have a five-to-six-month baseball draught fastly approaching. It is a time of the year I never look forward to, and that's why (in an effort to make things more bearable), I shall attempt to follow the NHL this season. That's how desperate I've become.

So I've picked the Twins. It was hard choosing between them and the A's (an organization I have greatly respected and sympathized with for several years now), but I was somehow drawn to the Twins. Even in August when they were in third place in the AL Central and the Red Sox season was going to crap, I was pulling for Minnesota. Why? Let me try to explain.

The Twins have won the World Series just three times, the last being in 1991. They have only gone to the the World Series six times and they've made it into the post-season a total of 11 times, three of which have come in the past five years. They've had the unenviable task of competing with teams whose payrolls double and even triple theirs. Yes, I said TRIPLE. Observe, if you will.

Twins 2006 payroll: $69.8 million

Yankees 2006 payroll: $198.6 million

They haven't had the pitching depth to make a decent post-season run in years, and now they do, even with Brad Radke and Francisco Liriano out. Pretty impressive. Lots of teams would have freaked out awhile ago, but this one has risen to the occasion.

Then there are the players. Two are legitimate Cy Young Award candidates, one could be Rookie of the Year, at least one will wind up getting some MVP votes, and one will most likely win the AL batting title. If that's not impressive, I don't know what is. This is an exciting team.

. . .

. . .

. . . Okay, okay, FINE. Plus, they have Joe Mauer. Yes, that had something to do with my decision. Leave me alone.

So to all those who have toyed with the idea of adopting a post-season team, do it. Forget anyone who questions your allegiance to your favorite team and enjoy October. It should be one of the more exciting playoff series in recent years and everyone should be a part of it.

more ramblings, since y'all love us

Ladies and gentlemen, the day is finally here.

Rich Harden starts tonight against the Cleveland Indians.

He's limited to 60 pitches and probably won't go more than four innings to ensure that his arm won't fall off, but whatever! YOU GUYS! WE CAN TAKE MY BOYFRIEND OUT OF THE BUBBLE WRAP NOW!

I am marking this occasion by rocking my #40 jersey during my historiography seminar tonight, and while it will garner some weird looks, I could not care less.

And for the record, Joe Mauer's ninth-inning single last night is entirely responsible for my karaoke stylings at An Tua Nua on Beacon Street. DAMN YOU, CATCHER BOOTY.

Overtired and incoherent

DISCLAIMER: This post is being written at 1:30 a.m. and may only make partial sense. Whatever. Let's see where my thoughts take us...

-- Yanks clinched tonight. And I don't even care. I've adopted the Twins as my post-season team and they beat the Sox (again) tonight. Good for them, man, good for them. How can you NOT root for a team with Joe Nathan, Justin Morneau, Johan Santana, and Joe Mauer on it? Exactly.

-- Speaking of the Twins, at An Tua Nua this evening...

Suzie and Emily (pretty much at the same time): "Quick! PAM! Joe Mauer's catcher booty is on TV!!"

-- I don't like Alex Rodriguez. And I resent anyone who says he's attractive.

-- I don't like Jeremy Shockey. This is random and somewhat unfounded but whatever.

-- Other people I don't like: Barry Bonds' lawyer, Tie Domi, Big Ben, Jason Giambi, George W. Bush (Not for the obvious reasons but for this. Jim Caple's got the right idea.)

-- People I do like: Peter Gammons, David Ortiz, Laurence Maroney, Joe Nathan, Tiki Barber

-- Mets finally won the NL East title, qualifying as the most unsurprising sports story of the year, aside from Art Shell crushing the hopes of every Raiders fan a mere two weeks into the NFL season.

-- Justin Verlander: Wassup man? You were going to be the AL Rookie of the Year. Now? Notsomuch.

-- Just realized I forgot to eat dinner tonight. Woops.

-- The ladies of Chickball have been hyping up this Hot/Not entry for quite a while now, so I'm giving everyone a deadline: Monday, October 2. Mark your calendars, y'all. Lots of photospam and goodness.

-- A few thoughts on NFL, Week 2: Jacksonville scares me, the Giants-Eagles game was INSANE, Laurence Maroney is still my homeboy and I may just buy a Patriots #39 jersey, Bill Cowher will be frightening in practice this week, umm PEYTON MANNING, it gave me a sick pleasure to see Adam Vinatieri out, I feel bad for Jon Gruden, and (surprise!) the Dolphins don't exactly look like a threat this season.

Now I sleep.

football, week 2

Well, Pam does better posts about football (since she, like, finds time to watch games). But too bad, Chickball fans, I'm postin...

about how much ASS the Bears are kicking!! Okay, so it's the Lions and the Packers, not hard, but it's great to be winning something. While I do feel bad for poor little Kyle Orton (he's adorable, shutup), Rex is doing amazing. On the topic of midwestern teams, who feels that Brett Favre should have retired? Everybody should be nodding. How painful is watching him? I mean, he gets no support from his team. Which is exactly what happened last season. It's going to be even more painful as the season goes on, I hope he takes a hint and retires already. I mean, he probably has several job offers for announcing and he's guaranteed a spot in the hall of fame. Why continue with playing? The risks are greater than the rewards, and that means a NO-GO decision (this commentary brought to you by econ 102).

First off, I think the Jags are going to be the team to watch right now. They've beaten the Cowboys AND the Steelers in their first two games, and considering how solid those teams usually are, that's saying a lot. And both have been by a solid margin. The Jags have a complete game: a reliable QB, solid offensive support, and a good defense to back it all up. I'm looking forward to watching them this season. A lot of younger players, but they look very much like a team out there.

The Bengals look like they're picking right up where they left off last season. Carson Palmer is going to keep getting better and I have nothing but hope for this team. Although I, as a rule, hate Ohio and most everything that comes out of it. Besides the Bengals: Indy, Seattle, and to a lesser degree the Giants and Broncos, are all looking to be about where they were at the end of last season. I'm expecting good things from this season, it should be exciting. There are a lot of stand out organizations right now, we'll see which ones can make it to January.

(and yes, baseball is officially dead to me. for the season anyway.)

grumpy sunday morning

So Michelle Wie failed to make another PGA Tour cut. And some people are a weeeee bit too happy about that. (Links via Deadspin, that which gives me much joy.)

You know what? All this criticism is ridiculous. So she wants to challenge herself -- big deal. She's on a sponsor exemption, so it's not like she's taking a spot away from someone who actually deserves it. And the thing that everyone seems to forget -- she's sixteen years old. Jesus Christ on a saltine cracker, do you know what I was doing with my weekends when I was sixteen? I complained about my hair, watched Buffy reruns, and moped about how, like, that totally cute band dork didn't like me back, which was an international tragedy in those days.

So maybe she should give the LPGA a shot next year. Maybe she got in over her head on the PGA. But on what planet is it okay for grown men to get snarky and insulting about sixteen-year-old girls who are actually challenging themselves at a young age? God, I hate the media, and I hate men.

(Okay, I'm lying about that last part. I am actually a really big fan of men. Except for that totally cute band dork, who never did like me back. Grrr!)

The NFL, week 1

After a glorious sports weekend that included such events as an Ohio State-Texas matchup, the US Open, Patriots-Bills, the Sox winning a game against the Royals (!!!), and some Manning-on-Manning action, I'm exhausted and waaaaay behind on homework. Ah, the plight of a sports fan. But it was so worth blowing off Kissinger and Nixon to watch all of this go down. Here's my take on the NFL, week 1.

Player I'm most excited about: The Patriots' Laurence Maroney. A first round draft pick, Maroney was an animal in college but with Kevin Faulk and Corey Dillon being the resident Pats running backs, his position on the team was uncertain. Well, looks like they'll all be getting a fair amount of playing time and if Sunday's game is any indication, that's a good thing. The three combined for 183 rushing yards, with Maroney racking up 86 yards on 17 carries with one 27-yarder. So awesome. I love this guy already.

Without a doubt the favorite moment: The Steelers' Joey Porter kissing Bill Cowher on the cheek after his interception. Yup. This guy has a history of being a crazy person, but this was just hilarious. The announcers were beside themselves, and Andrea Kremer called him out on it in a post-game interview. Of all people, too. Bill Cowher. Gotta love this game.

The "Yeah, I kind of expected this to happen" moment: Daunte Culpepper sucking it up. I really and truly feel for the Dolphins right now. Here they are, trying to bounce back with their first "decent" quarterback since the Dan Marino years and they dish out the money for Daunte Culpepper. For their sake, I wanted to believe Culpepper would finally live up to those high expectations, but somehow I knew it wouldn't happen. Bill Simmons called it, I called it, we all called it. I mean, the game wasn't a complete blowout but the score (28-17) really does not illustrate how horrendous Culpepper performed.

Runner up for the "Yeah, I kind of expected this to happen" moment: Reggie Bush. He's, like, wicked awesome, blah blah blah, the Texans were fricken idiots to pass him up, blah blah blah...

WTF moment: Tom Brady getting sacked on the first play of the season, resulting in an immediate Bills touchdown. I think Patriots Nation was in a collective state of shock. Unreal. But they won and they're still wonderful and this team never ceases to be exciting.

New favorite ad: The Comcast On Demand commercial for The Chronicles of Narnia. Fake interviews with centaurs, people. Amazing. Additionally, I really like the MacBook commercials with "Mac" and "PC," probably because I'm now the proud owner of a MacBook and these ads make them look far superior. Which they are.

Least favorite ad: Pretty much anything that has Peyton Manning in it. How many products is he endorsing at this point? Ridiculous. Every other commercial, it was him, Eli, both, them with their dad, etc, etc. Talk about overkill. Let's hope this doesn't last the whole season... or they'll at least be limited to Colts and Giants games.

Most amusing moment: Speaking of Peyton Manning, some of the footage NBC aired of him playing football at a young age was priceless. There's a young Peyton, age three or four, running the football and some kid tries to tackle him. The reaction: Peyton throws a pseudo tantrum, yelling, "MOM! HE GRABBED ME BY THE NECK! HE CAN'T DO THAT!!" Nice to know he was a little bitch back then, too.

Most ironic moment: Okay, so I'm kind of overdoing this Peyton thing, but hey! That's what the media does! Anyway, John Madden seems to have a mancrush on Peyton, praising him on Sunday whenever he got the chance a la "Tim McCarver hearts Derek Jeter." Late in the game came this...

Madden: "He [Peyton] knows where his target is. He sees it, he executes it."

10 seconds later...

Giants interception!!!!!111

(Hehehe)

Worst style choice (Yes, I'm a girl, deal with it): NBC sideline reporter Andrea Kremer's hair. Sorry, Andrea. I think you're talented, I want your job, but you need to do something with your hair. There, I've said it.

Worst-looking movie: I saw several ads for "How to Be a Man" and not only does it look atrocious but... I really just don't get it. These guys go to a school and harrass each other? They constantly play pranks? They yell a lot? I dunno, maybe it's just me.

Idiot announcer moment: During the Giants-Colts NBC halftime show...

One of the announcers: "Ya know, I haven't seen Chad Pennington look this good since their Super Bowl run."
Bob Costas: "...And when was that?"

Yes, that's right. I aspire to write material for these people. Woo.

Everything sucks, lalala.

Well, the first game of football was last night, and the Steelers took out the Dolphins in a testament to why they won the Superbowl and how great football can make you feel. If anybody was watching (which I wasn't), you heard that the Pittsburgh mayor died last week and that the victory was going to help the grieving city overcome its loss. Overcoming loss by winning, eh? It's sheer brilliance. Anyway, I wasn't watching because Beth and I were doing an Arrested Development marathon, and I don't really like either team. Sorry, I'm shallow. But ahhh does it feel good to get football back!

...because the Cubs have achieved a notable plunge into last place of the god damn NL Central. Yes, friends, the very last place. They are tied with Tampa Bay for the second worst record in Major League Baseball. Of course, as long as Kansas City is around, they'll never be last place of everything ever. But since the Cubs are only four games in front of KC, I'm sure I'll be eating my words before the season ends, which is not soon enough.

So, a run-down here of how much baseball sucks right now: my home team (Cubs) are so far out of playoff contention that it's funny. My adopted-home team (RSox) are 9 games back from first and probably not going to make the Wild Card. My backup home team (WSox, COME on) are out of the wildcard by a half a game, but their prospects are a little dim. So I don't really care what happens in the post season.

OK, I'm lying, of course I care. I'm thinking either Detroit (my family is really tight with Michigan) or Oakland are going to win it all. The Twins? Not so much. Of course, if I had gone to UofM Twin Cities for college instead of BU, this would be a much different post. But then again, I wouldn't be posting it because I would have never met the lovely ladies who started Chickball. Hm. And I'm not even considering the NL will get anywhere. What a crappy league. YEAH I SAID IT. ::cries::

I, like so many other Chickball writers before me, did indeed succumb to the crushing heartbreak of the Red Sox total collapse and had to take a little bitty break from baseball. It's cool, though, I suppose it's better they collapse in August then make it to the playoffs and then show how incredibly weak (from injuries or what have you) our team is this year. For now, let's focus on the positives:

Congratulations Anibal Sanchez on your no-hitter! Oh, PS, would you maybe be interested in coming back to Boston anytime soon?

Roberto Clemente nominations have come out- it's wonderful to see the variety of names, from rookies to OldLOL Clemens, some relative nobodies and even Big Papi. I think it's important that these guys with their huge salaries show that it's important to try and do for others, hopefully it will encourage even more players (and regular folks as well).

And of course, we all want to send our hopes and prayers out to Jon Lester, who is not much older than all of us here, and is having to deal with one of the hardest challenges life can throw at you. Luckily, being here in Boston, he does have the resources of DanaFarber backing him, and again all the fans are pulling for you, Jon.